Fear Not

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9 NIV

August 2011 was a turning point in my life. Seven short months after losing my mom, I found myself packing our belongings for a move we had postponed when we learned she was battling Lewy Body Dementia. Two moves in those seven months, because we had moved in with my dad after mom’s passing, in the hope of helping heal his broken heart.

What I had hoped our family could be for my dad was not to be. We tried to be a comfort and fill an empty space that only God could fill.

Sometimes we need to get out of his way.

But I was sorely afraid of this move. Afraid of losing my dad to a broken heart. Afraid of what these huge changes would mean to us as a family with young children. Afraid of what it would mean for us as we were healing in our marriage. Afraid of moving hours away from the only life and friends I had ever known.

Too many uncertainties, too many unknowns. Paralyzed by fear.

Have you ever wondered why the Bible repeatedly commands us not to fear? I think God knew we need the repetition to combat our repeated “what ifs.” We can "what if" ourselves into an unproductive life of stagnation.

That is not the life God calls us to. Not by a longshot.

Little did I know that fear-filled move would help bring about my father's healing by allowing a space to be filled in his heart that we weren’t meant for. That my children would continue to be resilient no matter where they were raised. That our marriage would grow stronger because we’d both be able to live into lives we were being called to, even in my case when the calling felt fuzzier than tv static.

If you weren’t alive before the 1990’s, look it up, it’s a thing.

I was so wrapped up in fear that I couldn't see the opportunities being laid before me. All I could see was my husband's shot at what God was working in his life. I thought my place was simply to support him in that, while raising our children, and for many years that was my sole focus. Even though I continued to walk on eggshells out of fear of all the scenarios that were going through my head, God kept gently nudging me and telling me it was going to be okay. To not fear.

He knows we learn best by repetition.

In my stubbornness, I continued feeble attempts at exercising control over my life, not fully understanding that if I would just let go, and let God, he would provide the steps to follow into whatever he was calling me to. I thought I had to map it out, make a plan, set up a series of steps to work through, goals to achieve...you get the idea. And while a certain degree of planning, goal setting and lists are good in their place, sometimes you have to just let go and see what God's going to do.

And sometimes what God lays out for us to experience are things we don’t even recognize as part of the plan, until way down the road.

I was paralyzed in planning out of fear. Stuck thinking I had to have every scenario mapped out, and contingencies accounted for. That is not living fully. That is living in a self-created, fully-limiting comfort bubble.  We must learn to put fear in its place and understand that mistakes and failures are invitations to grow, not the end of the world.

It may not seem like much to many folks out there, but the simple act of writing this article, when it took me two years to work up the courage to even go to the first writers’ meeting I attended, is a huge answered prayer. From that one seemingly simple step, which was greatly filled with fear, I received affirmation and encouragement. I developed friendships, and learned of tools and opportunities that I would never have been aware of had I not walked through that door.

Had we not moved here in 2011, when it felt like my world was spinning out of control.

That fuzzy calling began to come into better focus, and now, years later, I have the honor of walking with my beautiful sisters in Christ as we learn more about how we can grow into the fullness of the life God has prepared for us. I’m still walking the journey, and will continue to ask him “what’s next,” instead of “what if,” until I take my last breath.

I find there’s joy to be had in the anticipation of what his answer will be.

So here's a “what if.” What if instead of fearfully white knuckling the ride of this journey, we loosen that grip, let him take the wheel, and raise our eyes to instead see the great opportunities he’s placing before us? God tells us in the preceding verse, Joshua 1:8, that if we instead meditate on his word and use it as a filter for our actions, we will be prosperous and successful.

What is that God nudge that continues to return to you time and again? The one that you are feeling a bit fearful about stepping out in faith to do? Walk across the threshold he's inviting you to cross, and behold the blessings that can be brought by exercising faith over fear, one small step at a time.

Father God, our protector and redeemer, we come to you asking for the courage to let go of the fear and control which we try to exert over our lives. We pray that you would open our eyes to see the next small step of faith you wish for us to take as we try to live fully into the life you are calling us to. Help us to see that when we stumble, you are reaching toward us with your hand of grace and mercy, helping us not to fall, but to grow from the experience. Guide our steps so that we may in turn be your vessels of grace and love in the world around us, even when we aren’t yet quite sure how that’s supposed to look. We praise you for the seemingly unrelated experiences that happen, even the ones we’re not so sure about, which will someday come together as we gain a glimpse into your beautiful plan. We pray in the precious name of Jesus, amen.

-Laura Greer

Women2Women

Women2Women is a ministry that encourages women to cultivate an intimate relationship with Christ, while also exploring how God has uniquely created, gifted, and called each of us. We connect with women where they are in life’s journey, providing opportunities for spiritual growth, health and wellness, intergenerational fellowship, friendship, and mentoring. Events and retreats are targeted to the needs of women so we can grow deeper in our faith, develop our gifts and abilities, and establish long lasting friendships. For more information contact Laura Greer at (828) 456-3993, ext. 204 or Laura.Greer@LongsChapel.com, or Vickie Staib at (828) 646-8819.